raining

~im so depressed and unwell... i seriously have been thinking about taking myself into the hospital and ive never done that before.  Im hurting so much and feel so alone.  I have no one to turn to for support and i feel like i cant talk to anybody...

sore throat

My throat hurts... :( dont feel very good to tell you the truth. Im gonna go run outside and skip and run the stairs at the gazebo....dunno how much ill be able to do. Maybe with the movement ill feel better. I think it might be allergies. ugh ...

Jack Russel- woofty

~morning~ Supposed to go up to 80 today but with thunderstorms etc. ech. So i went to the athletic training class yesterday; that was my second one in one week.... ive been pushing my cardio training trying to increase my strength, power and...

gonna barf literally

~ im pretty scared to go today.... my stomach is crampy and hurting me.... Maybe im doing the wrong thing since she was such a bitch the last time i was there. she basically boxed me for three hours.  It was obnoxious... not to mention the weather...

in principle

~ well im tired, but wired... i cant seem to go to sleep. Im way too upset and restless from the ridiculous waste of time session or should i say boxing match i had for three hours with my pseudo counsellor. I requested a change of counsellor...

women's day- rhetoric

~ after yesterday i am afraid to venture into today... ugh. Happy women's day folks! For all the legitimacy it has anyways; rhetoric just like do gooders and feminists and lesbians that love women and abuse us themselves. Talk is cheap. I got to...

Ignore it and it will go away

~ morning folks~ I think that was Savoy the other day, and now she thinks im uggo and grosse ( not like she hadnt before ) and is not reading my stuff or gives a shit about.... again not like she did before. Hey w/e judge on like my mom runway...

invisible

~ I feel like i am invisible.... like my feelings dont matter to anybody.  I have people mistreating me non stop and then if i say anything in opposition to it, they ignore me completely. It is the epitome of disrespect. hurting doesnt...

Skinny mister

~  Gmornin.... Im off to the gym for a little bit of a workout, then to my moms to workout the gals... it looks like rain so we will probably have to workout inside.  Yesterday was stellar for the pool, but my stupid step dad was home, so nix say.  I...

finally, justice

~What a day!  im gettin fat back to the grind girly.... i was in the hospital all am. that was a smashing good time. Not.  My neck is starting to get to feeling a bit better... they did the pre op thing and that as well as checked out my crick... I...

woo hooo privacy

~Hey folks... feeling pretty lonely these days.  I feel like i am unloved, and unliked, and generally, just forgotten.  It is a horrible feeling when you feel like you have no one to talk to or that you matter to.  I think that is why i can relate to...

new moniker

~ well welcome to my inaugral blog entry.... i am finally losing those that have been stalking me for over three years... i went to a boxing club to their therapeutic program; a supposedly empowering program for survivors of violence.  They have...