the morning air is melancholy and the sun reminds me of the life and joy
that surrounds me
it looks like i wont be working there
i had my interview on friday, and havent heard from them since.
he told me that they would let me know by friday night
that is so weird just as i wrote that sentence
the phone rang of their number!
now im afraid to listen to the message.
i will be available tomorrow.
Today will be my last day of freedom if im now employed.
Holly had asked me to come and see her
that is my ex girlfriend from cleveland
while she is on vacation
so much for that
i havent seen her in forever!
i hope they only have me in two to three days a week
that is what im going to request anyways
before we get deeper into it
two would be plenty to start with.
im glad tho i will have that
without the barn and the wildlife center throughout the summer time.
omg my body is killing me
with adding on my pool workouts and my running again back on track
god this getting old shit is for the birds.
ive really been thinking a lot lately about jessica and ezzy girl
that both passed last summer.
on the 22nd would have been Jess' 41st birthday and that is the day my Rebel leaves me and riding ends etc.
gonna be a hard day.
i gotta meet with my financial advisor today
to go through my life insurance policy
on my last day of freedom more than likely
im half inclined to skip the gym
but then i dont want to do that if i wont be able to get to it for a while like the only thing on the agenda.
i have been trying to eat more eggs
because they are supposed to be high in protein and amino acids which help in muscle growth and repair
and choline which is supposed to help with weight loss
well if i hated the taste and texture of everything the way i hate eggs, id be skinny just for that reason.
that said i can see a huge difference in the thickness of my hair, and my skin looks better on my face even.
I lost three pounds since last week.
i am exactly the weight i was when i started that boxing program with savoy
ten years ago?
then i lose about six more pounds
and looked emaciated
to other people anyways.
i think the neighbors got rid of their dog Lola
i feel so heart broken for that little dog.
she loved me
i loved her up too everytime i saw her in spite of them
i bought her christmas presents every year
nothing for them
i used to talk to her little face in the window.
she was looking shabby long haired and unkempt
nadine used to love her
kept her hair really well
and loved her you could tell
her eyes were gooky and she was long and untended and uncared for
i feel so sad for that dog. seriously like it is bothering my spirit
i havent seen her outside in like at least two weeks
nor in the window
i hope they didnt sell her to some ass for breeding
because they hadnt spayed her even.
and she was pure bred.
i hope they didnt sell her to a dog ring
for some drugs.
i wonder if the owner stipulated they couldnt have a dog
thinking he would get rid of them from that apartment with that
and then be able to hike the rent even more.
he is such a douche bag the new owner
he is relentlessly harassing.
he shut my hot water off
then my phone.
then he takes it upon himself to cut down all the bushes in the front
so he can remove my cat shelter
that has sat there for three years.
like so important in the larger scheme of things that need done around here?
such an ass
so then i moved the shelter out of the garbage cue
and put it in the foyer of the building
waiting on moving it
or deciding what to do with it
he says you can put it in the rear of the building.
ya near where i feed birds?
you know in essence he is breaching contract with me
because i contract to live on and use these properties.
he is always targeting my use of
he removed my bird feeder without telling me even
and then moved the second one
then the shelter
he does not have the right to target
one tenant over the others
and yet they can use the premises as they choose and pay for.
but not donna?
like how prejudiced is that.
and he doesnt have the right to throw my stuff
in the garbage
it is still my property
it is like theft and vandalism
so i had moved it into the foyer
and i had a long while ago complained that the new kids
were leaving the front door unlocked when they exited the front.
he said he'd put a notice up for that
i said im pretty sure there is a notice up
from the previous owners.
anyways yesterday i get up and go out
and he has again removed my shelter from the foyer now
and put it back into the garbage line on the side of the building.
he took it upon himself to rip down the notice on the door that said
lock the door.
this man is such a harassing bully himself.
he wants no one living in his building
he makes no sense.
and he needs a real job.
for real little pasta laden trust fund baby
and then harasses people he discriminates against
so he can piss them off so they blow off
and he can throw them out
or they get sick and tired of what an asshole he is
and they leave themselves.
then he can have a little project like a retired person
to focus on for a month or two
and then he can hike up the rent to 1050 instead of 750.
he is just a mean spirited ass.
and im sick of him constantly touching MY stuff when other people have what they want
where they want
he says to me as per rental agreement you are not allowed to have things in the hallway
i said it wouldnt have been there if you had left it where it had been for three years.
he had nothing to say to that.
except an eviction notice im sure.
he is just a mean one
i pray for him all the time.
i can feel the sadness from them downstairs
they are quieter than normal
i heard him calling her stupid all weekend.
i feel badly for them sometimes.
even tho they are the biggest assholes on the face of the planet most of the time
i pray for them too.
yep i feel sadness on the wind especially in the morning and at dusk too
i feel those i have lost on the wind
i breathe them into my lungs
and i long for them in my heart.
and more loss to come with my Rebel.
hopefully a chance for new growth with a job.
im afraid to listen to the message
i hope Lola is not being mistreated and if she is that someone will notice and step up and help her
i pray for her too.
animals are so vulnerable.
people are often
so cruel and heartless.
i know that too all too well.
anyways best get moving
i dont wanna.
talk to ya later.